The Radio Equalizer: Brian Maloney

13 February 2006

Franken at HuffPo, O'Reilly's Unlikely Support

'JUST TO WATCH HIM DIE'

Franken Funny, Off His Meds, Or Kimball-ed?




When defending Al Franken's so-called "humor", leftists usually insist unenlightened conservatives simply can't grasp his supposedly sharp, sarcastic wit.

"Franken doesn't telegraph his jokes, which are often witty exercises in hyperbole," writes the Sydney Morning Herald in a recent glowing review of The Truth (With Jokes).

If that's really the case, count the Radio Equalizer in with those who enjoy sedentary comedy routines. On the heels of his recent "joke" about sleeping with Playboy centerfolds is this new Franken Huffington Post laff riot:


Over the weekend, Vice President Dick Cheney shot a man in Texas. Asked why he shot the man, the Vice President said, "Just to watch him die."

Seriously, it was an accident. There is nothing funny about the Vice President of the United States shooting a guy.


Then why the lame "joke"? Is this from Billy (the $600,000 man) Kimball's recycled "Late Late Show" files?

You know who's doing a "there but for the grace of God go I?" Scalia.

Bush is confused. He thinks Wittington is just fine. He thought he read a headline saying "Wittington Dodges Bullet."

Now, I imagine that Cheney and the President have hunted together. What would have happened if Cheney had shot the President? I think if he shot Bush this way, Bush isn't 78 and he's in pretty good shape, and he's kinda macho. I think he would've gotten up and shot Cheney back. And I think they would've started blasting each other like in a Tarrantino movie.


Al, it's Tarantino.

By the way, Cheney shouldn't be allowed to hunt again, should he? You get one of these, right? I mean he came very close to killing the guy.

Anyway, be sure to listen to the Al Franken Show tomorrow - noon to three EST. And Vice President Cheney will be our special guest. And guess what? He's bringing his shotgun!


Sure thing, Mr. Franken, it might be a good idea if the Secret Service got a good look at the inside of your new Minnesota digs.

NewsBusters also has its own take on Franken's would-be late night routine.


Oddly, this isn't the whole story. With two entries over the weekend, his first since December (when he wrote about candy bars), Franken has suddenly become especially prolific at the liberal Huffington Post. Why the renewed interest in writing, is there a fresh need for career promotion?

On Saturday, Franken (or one of his Harvard "researchers") returned to that peculiar obsession with defending over-the-top Democrats at funerals:

I think a little more perspective is needed when addressing the comparison that right-wing bloggers and now some mainstream journalists (Howard Kurtz) have been making between the Wellstone Memorial and the Coretta Scott King Funeral.

To this day, there are still a lot of people, including Democrats, who've bought the right wing line on the Wellstone Memorial.

Specifically, that it was a cynical, premeditated political event that included endless booing of Republican politicians who came to pay their respects to their fallen colleague. I wrote a pretty detailed account of the Wellstone Memorial in my book Lies and the Lying Liars Who Tell Them, and nothing could be further from the truth. I did write that "reasonable people of good will were genuinely offended." The memorial was raucous and a couple of speakers said some things that were inappropriate - basically, let's win this (upcoming Senate) election for Paul.


While the Radio Equalizer doesn't agree with Franken's take on the latter issue, at least there's a decent attempt at taking a stance, unlike the Cheney nonsense. Note the substantial differences between the two posts, did the same person write them both?

UPDATE: liberal media can't get enough of Franken and Cheney's hunting accident. They're tagging the story "Quailgate". Here's the latest.


Meanwhile, on the Bill O'Reilly front, we thought this stunning, partial defense of the FOX News Channel host from the likes of Slate was too good to end up buried in the weekend news graveyard. In this piece by Jack Shafer, the petty effort by New York Times columnist Nicholas D Kristof to send O'Reilly to Darfur is attacked:

In a new column this week, Kristof proved his elephantiasis outbreak was more severe than O'Reilly's. After O'Reilly wrote in his column he couldn't take a break from his day jobs (radio and TV shows) to visit Darfur, Kristof asked readers on Feb. 7 ($) to pledge the amount of money they'd be willing to spend to send O'Reilly because maybe money, not time, is what's kept the TV host from making the hajj. This jab fails to qualify as wit because O'Reilly's TV and radio contracts and his best-selling books have made him hugely rich.

The pledge-drive prank makes less sense because Kristof isn't really asking for the money. "Don't send money; all I'm looking for is pledges," he writes in the Feb. 7 column, giving an e-mail address. How much have Kristof readers "pledged" to Kristof's ego—I mean, the O'Reilly trip? As of Feb. 10, $215,003, according to Kristof's blog. Har har.

Don't get me wrong. Bill O'Reilly deserves it in the shins—or even higher—at least two times a week. His bullying, grandstanding, and modern know-nothingism make him a plump target. But Kristof doesn't want to engage or debate O'Reilly, he wants to embarrass him by playing dada games.

Those whom the gods wish to destroy they first make a newspaper columnist. Most columnists start off with a bag full of ideas and endless energy. But the job begins to weigh on even the most talented journalist. He starts writing columns about columns he's written, about his kids, or about the deaths of relatives. He composes columns as open letters to world leaders—or writes from inside their heads. He quotes cab drivers. His columns become more assertion than argument. Finally, he starts picking silly, protracted fights with other media machers.

Kristof, a Times columnist since November 2001, can do better than this. If he's run out of gas, why doesn't he re-enlist as a reporter?

Sure, O'Reilly is attacked here along with Kristof, but that's about as good as it's going to get for a non-liberal in Slate.

Your Amazon orders that begin with clicks here, regardless of what you ultimately purchase, help to support the Radio Equalizer's efforts. Thanks again!

Images 1 and 3: David A Lunde, 2: Pete at IHillary, O'Reilly: CBS

17 Comments:

  • so, what exactly are you attacking franken for? i'm reading your post here, and i can't see anything that he did that was controversial or illegal. so what's your problem? honestly, i would love to know. and i love how you post kindergarten-quality photoshopped graphics that have absolutely nothing to do with the "story" at hand.

    By Blogger hardcore conservative genious, at 13 February, 2006 15:08  

  • Brian wrote:

    On Saturday, Franken (or one of his Harvard "researchers") returned to that peculiar obsession with defending over-the-top Democrats at funerals:

    obsession? Brian, that's like the pot calling the kettle black. You are saying that Franken has an obsession? lol

    By Blogger pbrauer, at 13 February, 2006 16:27  

  • I bet there is some PhD student somewhere monitoring Brian's blog frothings regarding Al Franken and doing a Thesis on it. It's some kind of syndrome.

    By Blogger Robert, at 13 February, 2006 17:30  

  • Why isn't Maloney writting about Ann Coulter's racist comments to the cheering crowd at CPAC this past weekend?

    By Blogger Dick Tuck, at 13 February, 2006 18:34  

  • Why the renewed interest in writing, is there a fresh need for career promotion?

    Because he and Arianna are good friends, and she does his show often. Perhaps he wanted to add a little value to her site. With the high hit count, I'd say it worked.

    Now as for your fiegned indignation regarding mocking Cheney's recklessness. Yes he was reckless. Every hunter knows that you have a responsibility of knowing where each of your fellow hunters are, even when shooting canned animals.

    When you shoot a fellow hunter, it's your fault. No ifs, ands, or buts.

    It's funny as hell. It wouldn't have been funny if Cheney killed the guy. But hey, his PR people say all he did was spray him or pepper him. Did you ever pepper a steak?

    By Blogger Dick Tuck, at 13 February, 2006 18:54  

  • "Mary Matalin told the WaPo: "The vice president was concerned. He felt badly, obviously. On the other hand, he was not careless or incautious or violate any of the [rules]. He didn't do anything he wasn't supposed to do."

    I think one of the rules is you're not supposed to shoot your hunting partner.

    By Blogger Dick Tuck, at 13 February, 2006 19:59  

  • If I may be so blunt in saying, WHY IN THE WIDE, WIDE WORLD OF SPORTS IS THIS A STORY?! THIS IS NOTHING MORE THAN A CHANCE TO TAKE DOWN CONSERVATIVES AND YOU ON THE LEFT KNOW IT!

    And I will say this, if I was an editor on a paper, and anyone used this as the front page story--THEY ARE FIRED AND I WILL GUARANTEE THEY NEVER WORK ANYWHERE IN THIS COUNTRY AGAIN! I'D EVEN TELL THEM PAPERS IN VENEZUELA PRINT THIS KIND OF CRAP--THE KIND CHAVEZ LIKES!

    I would even name and shame that person.

    Oh and Dick Head, HOW DARE YOU CALL ANN COULTER A RACIST WHEN IT'S LEFTIES LIKE YOU WHO ARE RACISTS??!!

    By Blogger The Real Bob Anthony, at 13 February, 2006 20:31  

  • Patriot World is funny. He's parodying himself.

    Speaking of which, Baloney, you do know Franken was just parodying Johnny Cash lyrics, right?

    Folsom Prison Blues by Johnny Cash
    I hear the train a comin´
    it´s rolling round the bend
    and I ain´t seen the sunshine since I don´t know when,
    I´m stuck in Folsom prison, and time keeps draggin´ on
    but that train keeps a rollin´ on down to San Anton..
    When I was just a baby my mama told me. Son,
    always be a good boy, don´t ever play with guns.
    But I shot a man in Reno just to watch him die
    now every time I hear that whistle I hang my head and cry..

    By Blogger Mr. Kite, at 14 February, 2006 09:51  

  • "And I will say this, if I was an editor on a paper, and anyone used this as the front page story--THEY ARE FIRED AND I WILL GUARANTEE THEY NEVER WORK ANYWHERE IN THIS COUNTRY AGAIN!"

    Bullshit detector redlines. Clear the decks!

    If you were the editor, it would be you who decided what went on the front page, moron.

    By Blogger Dick Tuck, at 14 February, 2006 09:52  

  • By Blogger Dick Tuck, at 14 February, 2006 09:57  

  • patriot,
    how can you say that the lefties are the racists when groups like Stormfront and the even the KKK all consider themselves conservatives, and they even encourage their members to run for local political offices as republicans? david duke is a longtime republican, and probably the most racist person in america.

    By Blogger hardcore conservative genious, at 14 February, 2006 10:51  

  • Democrats started the Civil War by seceding 11 states -- whose Legislatures they all dominated -- to keep blacks in bondage. There's, uh, one small (600,000 dead) instance of Democrat racism.

    Another? The KKK was FOUNDED by Democrats.

    How about Robert Byrd, Democrat Senator From West Virginia and former Klansman?

    Still not enough. There's a word for people who forget these things: Democrats.

    By Blogger Elnish Arundel, at 14 February, 2006 11:45  

  • Elnish Arundel,

    Nice set of lame half truths - I see you get all your "facts" from Half-truth Hannity. All those racists Democrats are now REPUBLICANS.

    And Robert Byrd has long since apologized for joining the Klan.

    By Blogger Robert, at 14 February, 2006 12:21  

  • Uh - just so I'm clear.

    Cheney shoots a man in the face, and instead of criticizing THAT, you criticize Franken (and only Franken) for making fun of him?

    Are you under a rock? The below is linked from CNN's main page:

    http://www.cnn.com/2006/SHOWBIZ/TV/02/14/cheney.jokes.ap/index.html

    By Blogger Lyin' Baloney, at 14 February, 2006 12:41  

  • your arguments might have been valid 150 years ago, elnish, but i'm talking about the present day, as Robert pointed out. i'll tell you what, call james kelso, david duke's right hand man, and ask him what party they are aligned with.

    By Blogger hardcore conservative genious, at 14 February, 2006 16:01  

  • And conservatives vote for...

    Asian-American Members of Congress:
    Democrat - 7
    Republican - 0

    Hispanic-American Members of Congress:
    Democrat - 18
    Republican - 6

    African-American Members of Congress:
    Democrat - 41
    Republican - 0

    Another stupid racist Coulter groupie is handed his head.

    By Blogger HeadHunter, at 14 February, 2006 19:13  

  • Brian - this is really becoming toooooo easy... do these people have a life or do they just stay angry and ill-informed by listening and/or hanging out with the wrong crowd (or radio station) all the time??

    The conspiracy theories (boo!) and the half-truths are something out of a poorly written screenplay, yet they BELIEVE it all and seem to gleefully swallow what ever is squirted in their direction it appears...

    By Blogger wise_n_texas, at 15 February, 2006 00:20  

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